🚨 WTF Just Happened?
So the stock market's been absolutely ripping for four months straight. New all-time highs every other week. Everyone's getting rich. Your cousin who sells insurance is suddenly giving you stock tips.
Then Trump dropped a tweet nuke: 100% tariffs on China.
BOOM. $1.7 trillion evaporated from the S&P 500 overnight.
But wait, 24 hours later, Trump's like "jk everything's cool" and the market bounced back like it just chugged a Red Bull.
Crisis averted? Not so fast.
🤔 Here's Where It Gets Weird
Yeah, stocks look amazing in dollars. But when you measure them against gold?
They're at 10-year lows.
Let that sink in.
The "gold-adjusted" stock market has been quietly dying since early 2024. It got worse when tariffs first hit in January 2025. And now? This latest tariff threat just accelerated the bleeding.
Translation: Those big sexy numbers you're seeing might be hiding some real problems.
Crash Expert: “This Looks Like 1929” → 70,000 Hedging Here
Mark Spitznagel, who made $1B in a single day during the 2015 flash crash, warns markets are mimicking 1929. Yeah, just another oracle spouting gloom and doom, right?
Vanguard and Goldman Sachs forecast just 5% and 3% annual S&P returns respectively for the next decade (2024-2034).
Bonds? Not much better.
Enough warning signals—what’s something investors can actually do to diversify this week?
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23 exits. Net annualized returns like 17.6%, 17.8%, and 21.5%. $1.2 billion invested.
Shares in new offerings can sell quickly but…
*Past performance is not indicative of future returns. Important Reg A disclosures: masterworks.com/cd.
💡 Why You Should Care
History doesn't repeat, but it rhymes (or whatever Mark Twain said). When stocks get weaker against gold, they usually start getting weaker in dollars too, eventually.
So yeah, the headlines are screaming "NEW HIGHS!" but the smart money might be quietly heading for the exits.
🎯 The TL;DR
The market shrugged off a $1.7T gut punch like it was nothing, impressive, but don't confuse resilience with immortality
That gold signal is flashing red, and ignoring it because "number go up" is dangerous
If Trump's Twitter fingers get twitchy again or tariffs actually escalate, things could get spicy fast
Bottom line: Ride the wave if you want, but maybe keep your helmet on
We'll keep watching Trump's tweet schedule, global trade drama, and whether this market is actually built on solid ground or just vibes.
Stay paranoid out there.